Another workshop on the horizon

The first Writing the Heartache All Day Workshop was a wonderful experience, and we are going to have another! This one will be held at the Hampton Inn in Cary, NC on August 21 from 8 AM to 5 PM. We will have a full day to write from our pain for healing, health, and hope. Come to write with us--poetry, from photographs, letters, and essays.

Announcing a new site for writing through grief

Friends,

Please join me as I launch the new Writing the Heartache website.

This site is where online courses, grief-writing postings, talkradioblog
segments, and seminars for my organization, Writing the Heartache, will be shared.

Thanks for spreading the word!

The BMW and the interview

Along with learning about how I got my literary agent and two-book deal, listen to the interview today at I Just Finished and hear how distracted I became at the end. Husbands should not come home with a 2009 BMW for parents to test-drive in the middle of a radio blog interview!

Writing the Heartache: What Does It Mean?

When Daniel died, writing took on a whole new meaning for me. Writing was my sanity, my lifeline to coping with the tragedy of losing a child to cancer. There were times I couldn't wait to rush to the shelter of my home so that I could pull out my pen and journal and pour out my heart. In the early days of grief, I needed a way to organize my muddled thoughts, work out my emotions, and scribble my prayers and fears.

Writing is an essential tool in grief. Writing calms us, lowers our blood pressure, slows our pulse, and keeps our minds from going crazy. When we can write out our feelings, they no longer loom large and out of control. By putting them on paper, we have contained them to a workable space in our journal. We can read them over and over and analyze, or we can choose to never look at our words again. Whatever our decision, the act of writing from our broken heart is healing.

My next Writing the Heartache online course starts August 24th and runs to September 25th. In these five weeks, I'll send participants assignments to complete via email. When these are sent back to me, I'll offer critique, support, and suggestions. We'll discuss writing for publication as well.

Outline for Writing the Heartache Writing Workshop
1. Week One: Introduction - Getting to Know You
2. Week Two: Introducing Your Loved One Through Poetry
3. Week Three: Writing a Letter to Your Loved One and to Others
4. Week Four: Writing for Change - The Essay
5. Week Five: Writing for Publication

Join us! Visit my website AliceWisler for more information.

Writing Into the Night

Special thanks to Jayne Newton for posting this on the
Atlanta Compassionate Friend's FaceBook site. I'd forgotten
that I'd written this, but then again, I forgot what
I ate for breakfast yesterday, too.

Writing into the Night

It's eleven p.m. and the rest of your household has slipped into bed, but your mind is bombarded and you can't sleep. You pick up a book, but the words are too lengthy to decipher at this hour.

As bereaved parents, and especially as newly bereaved, our minds have trouble concentrating and staying focused. It takes an enormous amount of energy just to get out of bed in the morning. So to have to read lengthy paragraphs and figure out what the author is saying can be too consuming. We want bite-size pieces to chew on, we want healing in easy-to-swallow capsules.

While reading the books on surviving life after the death of a child, are essential, so is something else--writing.

Writing's benefits are vast. Putting pen to paper releases pent-up feelings, some good, some nasty, but all honest. When you let your pain over the death of your loved one flow out on the paper, you are providing therapy. Your blood pressure is lowered, your pulse rate slows, and you give your heart an all-around healthy work-out.

Buy a notebook, spiral or bound. Set aside some time each day or night to write freely for ten to fifteen minutes. Write how you feel. Your notebook will not judge you. This is a friend who will hold all your secrets.

Let your mind remember as you write the memories of your child. View a photo of him at the beach and recall what the water and sun felt like that day. Remember a summer picnic at grandma's. What did your child eat? What did she wear? What were the expressions she used?

What did your child do that made you laugh? Sing in the bathtub? At the top of one of your notebook or journal pages write the word "Funny" and record those things that your child did that were funny to you.

We often think we will forget our child-- not his life, but pieces to his life. Sometimes a photo or a video can trigger a good memory. When these are brought to mind, write them down. Carry a notepad in our purse or in the car's glove compartment. I have written many of my son Daniel's antics in my notepad while sitting at a red light.

Studies have proven that writing through the pain is therapeutic. Give it a try! After pouring out your pain, you may even be able to find something else you need -- sleep.

~ Alice J. Wisler
~reprinted from Tributes June 2005