Toffee recipe from Down The Cereal Aisle

Down the Cereal is now available for purchase on my website. The cookbook is in memory of children who have died too soon. From the simple to the more complex, Down the Cereal Aisle holds tender food-related stories, recipes, poetry, and tips on how to cope with the loss of a child.

The recipe below is one I make a couple of times a year. With it comes a great memory in the actual cookbook. I'm only placing an abbreviated version of the entry here.

Teresa's Wonderful Toffee

15 graham crackers (2 1/2-inch squares)
1 cup of firmly packed brown sugar
1 cup butter or margarine
6 oz. pkg. milk or dark chocolate chips
1/4 cup chopped nuts

Heat oven to 400 degrees F.
Line a 13 by 9-inch pan with foil, oiled generously.
Arrange graham crackers in the pan. You might need to break the squares so that they all fit. In a saucepan melt the butter and sugar until the mixture boils. Pour this mixture on top of the graham crackers. Bake for 5 minutes and then remove from oven. Pour the chocolate over the top and spread it evenly. Add the chopped nuts by sprinkling them over the chocolate. Place in frige for at least 30 minutes. Cut into bars or break into pieces.

Store in refrigerator. Makes 24 bars.

~ From page 70 of Down the Cereal Aisle
In memory of Teresa Wesley Hough, April 25, 1968--October 2, 1993

What February Holds: Novel Giveaway for you!

Friends, readers, and bloggers,

The month of Feburary might be the shortest one in the number of days, but those days trigger many significant feelings for me.

When I was in high school, February was a depressing month, thanks to Valentine's Day and cold weather. I had no one I liked, or else the guy I liked didn't notice me. And the days were bleak in Kobe, Japan.

So when Daniel died on February 2, 1997, I thought, well, at least I never cared much for this month anyway. Now I have even more of a reason to despise February.

Two years ago I talked on the phone for the first time with Carl on February 16th. The next year (last year) we were married in Vegas on the 7th.

This year, I look forward to our anniversary and Valentine's with Carl. My football-lovin' friends think I should be happy that we get to celebrate our one year date on Superbowl Sunday.

But, for you, friends, I want to tie this month up in a huge red bow and offer my novel, How Sweet It Is in a random drawing. Just post something here about why you like or dislike February.

In memory of my sweet Daniel, the winner of this giveaway will also get a copy of my cookbook of memories, Down the Cereal Aisle. And a pack of my one-of-a-kind remembrance cards, Songs from Heaven.

So enter the contest by posting here! Be sure to include your email address so I can contact you, should you be the winner. Enter any time this month. The winner will be announced in March.

Cake recipe from How Sweet It Is

This winter, warm up your kitchen and taste buds with a delicious
cake. Jonas, the plumber, in the novel How Sweet It Is, loves
this recipe. I hope you will, too.


Jonas’ Favorite White Velvet Cake

4 large egg whites
1 cup of milk
3 teaspoons of vanilla
3 cups of shifted white flour
1 1/2 cups of sugar
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon of baking powder
3/4 teaspoon of salt
12 tablespoons of softened butter

Directions:
Mix the egg whites, 1/4 cup of milk and vanilla in a small bowl. In a mixing bowl combine the dry ingredients and blend on low. Add the softened butter and rest of the milk. Mix on medium speed, beating for two minutes. Scrape down the sides and continue to beat. Add the egg mixture a little at a time, and mix for thirty seconds after each addition. Pour batter into two greased 9-inch pans. Bake at 350 degrees F. for 30 to 35 minutes or until an inserted toothpick comes out clean. Let cakes cool in the pans for 10 minutes and then loosen the sides with a metal spatula. Invert onto wire racks to cool completely before frosting with butter cream icing.

Reflections on a life well-lived

What we have once enjoyed we can never lose.
All that we love deeply becomes a part of us. ~Helen Keller

And so, here I am again, approaching yet another anniversary of the death of Daniel Paul Wisler, my son, who left for Heaven on Ground Hog Day, 1997.

And I am grateful that after thirteen years, the anguish leading up to his death date anniversary is gone. I can look at his photo by my computer and smile into his blue eyes and not feel the panic or misery I felt on the first February 2 after his death. I see him with hair--lively and mischievous. I view the professional photo taken of him and his big sister, Rachel, where he had a wet spot on his little vest--my attempt to remove the sticky chewing gum before the photographer snapped the portrait. In another photo, I see his clear eyes, before cancer treatments touched them, and his wide smile at the birth of his baby brother, Benjamin.

Another year and I am older. Although the pain has lessened, and I've learned to cope with being the mother of a deceased son, the love has only grown. I have learned to love my three kids on earth--Rachel (19), Ben (14) and Elizabeth (12) much more. So, my love for Daniel (who would be 17) has increased as well.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of Daniel. His life, so well-lived, and death, has shaped me into what and who I am today. Losing a child is so powerful, considered the worst loss. Of course, it literally restructures your life.

I used to come to Compassionate Friends meetings and look at those tear-stained faces with new losses, like myself. Then I heard the voices of those who were more experienced, having lived through years of grief. Now, I am one of the latter--seasoned in grief, tougher, more resilient.

Yet tears still catch me. Sometimes, even unexpectedly, I will feel my eyes fill. Sometimes the tears come when I see a blond-haired toddler at the mall, or a kid wrapping his arms around his mother at church.

I have missed you for 4,745 days, dear Daniel. And I have loved you during every single one. I toast your life of four years, I sing to your memory, and I carry the love. None of it can be stolen from me. I'm grateful that you are my son and that I am your mother.

Sending a bereavement card to show you care

Bereavement cards, or more commonly known as sympathy cards, offer comfort and love to those who have had a loved one die. Most people send a card immediately after learning about the death. However, sending a card months later, as well as on a significant day of the year, is also appreciated. Those grieving want to know that you are thinking of them and aware of their loss throughout the year.

Songs from Heaven is one bereavement card you can send, letting the recipient know that you are remembering with them. On the front of the
postcard is a verse, and the back has ample space to write a note. The cards are sold in packs of ten, with white envelopes.

Venture to this website to learn more.

Hatteras Girl

My third novel, Hatteras Girl, will be released by Bethany House in October. The cover has been completed and I'm excited.

So what is the novel about? Read on.

There are two things that journalist Jackie Donavan dreams about--marriage and owning a bed and breakfast in Nags Head, NC.

But why is the bed and breakfast she desires deteriorating, and why won't her relatives behave so that she can go out with the handsome realtor? Filled with quirky friends and relatives that help and hinder Jackie to and from her goals, Hatteras Girl, is about uncovering the truth while finding the way to your dreams.

Why Writing the Heartache Works

Everyone knows that I teach and promote writing through sorrow and loss. The ability to release my anguish that bottled inside me each day after my son's death was healing. I took my journal and pen and wrote in between changing diapers (I gave birth to my fourth child three months after Daniel died), making peanut butter sandwiches for my toddler, and walking my oldest to the bus stop for first grade.

One of the books I bought that I highly recommend to the newly-bereaved is Forever Remembered. This small book is filled with cherished messages of hope, love, and comfort from courageous people who have lost a loved one.

The other day one selection jumped out at me, and I thought, "Ah, this is good. I wish everyone realized this!"

Here it is for you to read. It's nice to see that others feel that writing through grief is some of the best therapy there is. Give it a try today.

It was a few months after my grandmother's death that
I was taking a course in creative writing. My teacher suggested
that I record some of my thoughts to help me work through my sadness.
This diary became my memorial to her. Even now I read aloud the pages.
I still laugh and cry about times we shared together.

~Earl A. Grollman